And sometimes, when "everything" seems to go wrong all you can do is throw your hands up in surrender and acceptance. And then you realize that you still have so so so so so much to be grateful for and that life isn't going to suck everyday.
So after all that I turned on a movie for the kids (on the big TV no less…big treat) and snuggled with Levi and he held my hand. I realized that if things hadn't been horrible I probably wouldn't have sat down with the kids that night and I wouldn't have had that moment with Levi. The first of moments in a day that was redeemed - Easter Sunday, no less.
This past weekend Michael had the great opportunity to head back to Iowa to celebrate his grandpa turing 100. He had such a wonderful time and we were there with him in spirit. But man, did I miss my husband! Busy busy busy has been normal life and we haven't seen much of each other these past couple of weeks. But absence does make the heart grow fonder and we've vowed to never ever be apart for like forever. Unless we get tired of each other, then, well……
I came home from a weekend away at my parents' house to find that the front door handle had been super jiggled loose aaaaand it looked like someone tried to bust it off. The only people who had access to our house were neighbors and the FedEx guy and before I called in a tirade to the FedEx people I told myself I'd wait for Michael to get home to look at it. After he checked out the door he saw that it wasn't tampered with but just loose from the inside. Then yesterday I saw Max hanging on the front door handle after opening it for someone and I realized who my real burglar is.
|This would be me. On the stairs for 20 minutes. After a long day of driving and not looking forward to unpacking and laundry. Cry me a river. Or just poor me a drink and save it.|
Oh and the refrigerator? Broken. Downside: sticky frozen banana juice all over the floor and having to THROW AWAY FOOD MY BIGGEST PET PEEVE OF ALL TIME. Upside: we have another fridge in the garage and luckily I was low on the groceries in the regular fridge. But still. Boooooooo. We got it fixed yesterday and beings the introspective person God made me to be (stupid brain, will you just be quiet sometime?) I am actually grateful something like this happened. (FOR THE RECORD I was not grateful at the time. I was saying words that I should erase from my children's memory.) But for one, the kids got a lesson on the fact that actually having food is a blessing. And seeing an empty fridge reminded them (and me) to always be grateful for the abundance that we do have! Plus having an empty fridge is quite freeing. It teaches me to fill it (and other areas of my life) with only that which I need. Because you never know when it will be taken away. So now I get to start fresh and instead of just going out and refilling it with food, I will be intentional about meal planning and what I keep behind those black doors.
On the even more not fun side of the day, Levi is in this stage where, if he doesn't like some sort of food, he holds it in his mouth until all the drool is vacated from his body. Except this time the drool didn't happen and puke did. Apparently oatmeal and pizza don't go together so Levi decided to leave it all over the floor. And the table and the chair and the wall. Given that I wasn't feeling well either, I thought we were coming down with a stomach bug (either that or having been glutened) and either prospect didn't look exciting. Luckily the big kids aren't sick and maybe mom and Levi just share in our germs because we can't stop kissing on and snuggling each other. Oh well, small price to pay for a toddler love.
So there. Sometimes Good Friday lasts a little bit longer than planned. (Well, who really plans their crosses anyway?) But always always Easter Sunday shows up. Perhaps it shows up in the hand holding on the couch or in the lessons learned but it always comes around. And it is always glorious because of all the hard stuff preceding it. I know this won't be the last time super crappy things happen, because they happen all the time. The important part is that they don't last forever and the joy that follows is better because of it.
Happy Easter! He is Risen, Alleluia! And the best part about being Catholic through it all: we get to celebrate for 50 days!